Continuing into our 10th year with Generation Gap, we’ve added Jason Falls to the game. This month Dorothy’s baby daughter turns 50. Oh, no! So Dorothy, Ray and Jason, talk about hard learned tips for navigating parenthood. OH, come on. We must know something.
Dorothy observes that one thing that was the most successful tool for her children’s good behavior was sending them to their room – for an extended period. She goes on, “Now we were parents from The Silent Generation -1920 to 1940 there was no TV or radio, or at least there was a radio but everyone gathered around it as we do the TV today. Practically every child would experience alone time in their rooms every day.The time in the room was important to produce good character and providing a much needed break for Mom. A thing that surprised me today is that I heard parents comparing notes and mostly they had one or two children. I countered that I didn’t expect to be very successful, but in the 1950’s or 60’s When summer came, children were much more likely to be ushered outside after breakfast and told not to come back until dinner. Ray says he was told not to come back unless you were bleeding. In today’s show, you’ll hear Dorothy and Jason recall their growing up years. Surprisingly they don’t recall feeling neglected, but you may be surprised at how Ray looks at the changes the millennials have created.
Parenting Magazine observes that your birth generation does indeed affect your parenting style This article by Brianne Hogan Published on February 4, 2025 Fact checked by Sona Charaipotra.
Each generation of parents hopes to improve upon the shortcomings of the last. While many parents will always wrestle with the idea of “perfection,” how that manifests in their parenting is often specific to their generation.
Each generation tackles unique major life events that shape their parenting style, causing it to differ from one decade to the next. Here’s what your generation says about your parenting style, according to experts.
Generation X (Born 1965 to 1980)Major Events in Their Lives
- The fall of the Berlin Wall
- The end of The Cold War
- The rise of AIDS/HIV
- The Watergate scandal
- The rise of personal computers
- The emergence of MTV
According to Holly Schiff, PsyD, a licensed clinical psychologist, Gen X’ers are known for employing the helicopter parenting style. Helicopter parenting refers to a parenting style where the parent is excessively present in the child’s life, and hovers over all that they do—similar to a helicopter.
“They like to get and give advice about parenting and always learn about how to be a better parent,” she explains. “Generation X parents like to volunteer and be very involved in their children’s development, including being very involved in their child’s school.”
Dr. Kelley says many Gen X parents—raised largely by the Boomer generation—had less involved parents when they were children, which could explain why they prefer to be more present in their own children’s lives.
Of course, each generation had its own set of changes. Dorothy recalls twice weekly air raid drills when children had to huddle for hours on the classroom floor between the desks as Russian planes were expected.
Hard to imagine now, but Children of the Cold War had no vision of living to adulthood. Dorothy remembers thinking that if she lived to be 16 she would have lived a full life.
In today’s show Jason, Ray and Dorothy each highlight how current events change your parenting skills. Jason outlines the issues that arise as children approach adulthood, Ray is dealing with a the daily discoveries of having a four year old, and Dorothy is facing the fact that her children are all senior citizens. She is bemused.
[Gen X parents] support their children’s individualism and making their own choices. They encourage their children to be more independent and try new things.
Boomers are known for being a generation of parents that pushed high educational standards and high standards of living, which might explain why Gen X was one of the first generations of parents to move away from a more authoritarian discipline style and lean towards learning what the best ways to parent are. “Theories [are that] this generation became so interested in learning more about parenting in response to their lack of experiencing sufficient support as children themselves,” Dr. Kelley explains. “They are incredibly interested in encouraging individual choice while trying to remain engaged as parents.”
Millennials (Born 1981 to 1996)
- Major Events in Their Lives
- The Great Recession
- A childhood with internet
- The COVID-19 pandemic
- Rising living and childcare costs
- The rise of social media platforms
- The invention of smartphones
“Millennial parents tend to be more open minded than any of the generations before them,” Dr. Kelley says. “For that reason, they do not ascribe to overly specific parenting styles, but rather find value in positive parenting over authoritarian discipline.”
This might be due to the fact that Millennials also have fewer children, explains Dr. Schiff. This decision is likely caused by a myriad of reasons. In part, Millennials feel less pressure to partake in traditional markers of adulthood, like getting married or buying a house. This is largely influenced by financial realities like growing mortgage rates, rising living costs, and the crash of the job market—which can make self-sufficiency unachievable for many.1
Furthermore, the rise of social media and technology very much shapes how they parent. “Social media and the internet influence them as parents and [help them learn about] parenting in various styles,” she explains. Research even shows as much as 80% of parents of young children turn to social media for parenting advice.2 “They may have been children of Gen Xers, and used to the helicopter parenting style, so they are looking to have a more free and looser approach than what they were raised with. Millennials also may have been over-scheduled, so they try not to do the same to their children.”